Jesus was clear in Matthew 5:43-44 NIV about forgiveness to others. “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor but hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
I have been a Christian since I was a teenager. However, I have not always behaved like I was. I can remember a time when I was not a forgiving person. In 2010 we moved back to Arkansas after living in Washington state only 58 days. (Missed the grandkids) We had rented a small duplex sight unseen online. It was a month-to-month rental as we were going to buy a house again. When we arrived to unload, the duplex was full of heavy cigarette smoke from a previous tenant. We had to stay as we had paid ahead. We had the carpets cleaned and installed air fresheners everywhere but to no avail. The smoke was so bad. When we moved out after a few months we cleaned the carpets again and did a deep cleaning on the duplex. It was so much better than when we moved in. We kept the lawn mowed and even planted some flowers.
The owner decided to keep all of our $800 cleaning deposit. I called and asked why but she just said it was standard to do that. I got angry as the day went on and bought some poster board and a stick and went to her home and picketed back and forth in front of her house every afternoon for two hours letting all her neighbors know how we had been treated.
That was until I went to a Men’s Encounter one fall and the Holy Spirit, through one of the speakers, convicted me of my wrongdoing. When I got home, I told Michelle what happened. I sat down and wrote a long sincere apology letter to the landlord. I not only told her how sorry I was for my actions, but I told her I will pray for God to bless her life.
You see, revenge is not an option for true believers in Christ. Paul tells us in Romans 12:17-21 ESV “Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’ To the contrary, ‘if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
I have since grown in Christ where I do not do stupid things like that. It is sad that it took 53 years to learn that lesson. It is not our place to get revenge. It never has been. If someone hurts you or offends you, forgive them. If you can’t forgive them then ask yourself what Jesus has forgiven you for? Hmmm.
It has been said that when we forgive someone, we set the prisoner free, and then we discover shortly thereafter the prisoner was us. It is giving up the right to hurt someone who has hurt you.
You may be thinking “Why should I forgive them after what they did to me. You have no idea what they did to me!” Think about what they did to Jesus on the day of his crucifixion, and he forgave them while still in pain hanging on the cross! Ask yourself how His punishment measures up to your pain. How much time in your walk is spent thinking about resentment toward someone because of the hurt they caused you?
A vital part of the healing process is making sure you pray for good to come to the other person you are forgiving. The anger and resentment are no more. Forgiveness to her healed me by the grace of God. I have always believed everything that happens in this life happens for a reason. It is to grow us spiritually into a better person. Into someone people see as a reflection of Jesus. This often does not show up initially but after a time of forgiveness and understanding. It rarely comes in the heat of the moment.
If you harbor bitterness and resentment in your heart, it will show outwardly to others in your life walk. If you want the future of your walk with Jesus to live and thrive for Him, you must let go of the past hurts that people have done to you. It is too hard to follow Jesus when we keep looking back at our past behind us.
Looking Upward,
Jim Everett
